I seriously don't know what to do with my life anymore. Maybe my mom was right and that I should just play safe and help out in the family business. During my late teens I had so much dreams of becoming and doing many things like aiming to become a future doctor and travelling many places around the world. Fast forward to now that I am nearing my mid-twenties I realized that most of my dreams have either been shattered or made. Maybe my batchmates were right.. The first few months after graduation is the period where we would feel lost with our lives having no where to go but reviewing for the board exams..
Ugh! I never really expected to have landed into this monotonous banking job.. It has been 8 days since I got hired and I already feel bored with this job.. It is basically preparing for opening at around 8:30am then waiting for people to come in to handle their transactions and by 3:30 or 4pm that is when I start noting everything and finishing up everything before the shift ends. During my rest day, I decided to visit one of the few temples in my area to ask for a sign.. Sadly I did not get an answer but maybe the sign is yet to come.. I wanted to become a doctor but then I realized that all the time and effort is just not worth it in the end.. Doctors here are abused.. Think of low pay jobs and even abusive working conditions.. Sometimes the patients are not even worth helping..
An excerpt from a chat I had with an officemate one afternoon
Me : I don't know if this is too personal to ask but despite the low pay what made you decide to stay in this company for more than 2 years?
Officemate: It's the people I work with that made me stay.. Despite the low pay atleast I am happy doing my job and that the people I work with keep me happy as well..
Buhhh... I just cannot handle this monotonous job.. I am simply not happy... So I know this sort of sounds selfish and insensitive but buuuh I am gonna resign after my first pay and pay the cash bond to buy-out my 3 month probationary contract.. Maybe working in a call center would be better to atleast have a taste of what it feels like to work in a call center..
I know I am not making any sense to any of you right now but buhhhhh I just wanted to blurt this all out..