Its been nearly six years since I last saw them. I found it so awkward for them to still acknowledge me, despite laying low to slowly get out of their lives. The world is just so small that I can't seem to avoid the people I once shared good memories with. I know that we have cut ties in a mature way. I know that we have tried to make up for each others wrong doing. But It's just so hard to rekindle the flame of friendship that was once there. I just do not want to be friends with them anymore. I do not want to have anything to do with them anymore.
I can't hold grudges against them forever but I feel like things will never be the same. That there would be no point in even trying. Its been nearly six years and despite talking this over before. I still remember being betrayed. I still remember how they never listened to me. I still remember feeling lost. I still remember the pain and until now I still am hurting.
I choose never to attend every party, every reunion, every gimmick they invite me to. Their efforts of trying to rekindle the friendship that was once there has gone to waste. I chose to give short replies to the conversations they make on facebook or make any participation in group conversations. I really just do not want to be friends anymore. It's hard.. I don't want to see their faces anymore. I have a better life now & I have friends so much better now. For the past six years I have been doing so much better without them but I hope someday I will eventually soften up to them..
I have forgiven but not forgotten.
Woah! I am rarely ever sad or mad. But after seeing a friend of mine who used to be close to me while volunteering to repack goods at ABS CBN. Memories just came rushing back in. The hurt, the feels.. This person tried again for the nth time to warm up to me but up until now I cant help but still feel cold towards them.. Im sorry its just me